Decided last month to scratch the mixtape since I missed yet another opportunity, but good work can’t go to waste like that. Lyrics and selected instrumentals were ready to go since November, but now currently retouching and rediscovering the flow to each song so hopefully you’ll hear some within these next couple of weeks. I’m just glad to say I rediscovered this lost hobby so hopefully I can finish recording these songs fast and progress to making my own beats. Thaat will be the dubbed the mixtape. I’m real thankful for the friends, family, and random people around campus who’ve given me compliments and convinced me to stick with it and put myself out there.
For now, just keep an eye out, no bullshit this time.
You explore every avenue and possibility of your situation
at high speed with total clarity.” —Banksy
Within the last year in a half, I’ve changed a whole lot. No doubt about it. I’ve been completely different and not myself. I thought maybe I was going through depression, but then again I always came to the conclusion that I wasn’t. I thought I was going crazy and that something was wrong with me, and I think I finally realized why my life has just not been the same since I left for college.
Well, I’ve been on this type of antiobiotics for my sensitive skin for the last year and a half. I decided to get off them about a month ago just because. To be honest, I haven’t felt this great in a long long time, so I decided to research it myself and read reviews online. Turns out the side effects are “depersonalization, mental changes, confusion, anxiety, dizziness, outer body experiences, etc.” I also learned that the amount I was told to take a day was considered heavy compared to regular use.
I’ve read countless stories about how people felt anti-social, not being able to concentrate on conversations, or just not feeling themselves. They all didn’t recommend it unless the person him/herself thought it was worth it. I mean I’m not trying to blame the meds for the way I’ve been, but I can’t help but think this is exactly how I’ve been feeling for the longest time. And to think that I took it every morning and night? Well fuck.
The last month however has been great. I feel like I can talk to people again and actually have fun when I go out. I used to get stuck at places and have the craziest thoughts. Sometimes I felt like I wasn’t even physically there at places and that I was just watching myself.
I was planning on keeping this to myself, but fuck it. I’ll just try to forget all the countless weird, creepy experiences I’ve had. I’m just glad the effects aren’t permanent or anything. I mean, maybe it wasn’t the meds, and I might be treating this as some placebo effect but I can’t help but feel this way. Gattttttdamn.
Came to the conclusion that it’s about that time of life to get back to social networking. Maybe I’ll start posting my photography and graffiti artwork once again. Maybe even grant you guys access to the details of my lifestyle by avoiding that private feature and letting you deep into my intellectual thoughts for once. Maybe even share the music that keeps me sane by posting the jams that represent my exact vibe and mood at that given moment. Maybe I’ll even announce and release my upcoming mixtape called Vapor… wait what?
Or maybe I’m just reverting back to old hobbies ever since my followers have been cut in half. Maybe it’s ‘cause I’m happy to see my blog get this “low-key” ever since the “THEE” days. Maybe I’m just another 19 year old that realized he grew up too fast and forgot about all the simple pleasures in life that he knows as passions. Maybe I finally confirmed that I’m going to be a Business Marketing major with a minor in Design and realized going back to social networking is the smartest thing to do in the world we live in today. Cough.
Well either fuckin’ way, I hope to get back on that good good so steady catch me grind’n I could give 2 fux what you know or think about me. Goodvibesorgetthefvckout.
Dooses - ML.